Solo Road Tripping

Road trips have always seemed like they should be relaxed meanderings over highways and byways.  For me they never seem to turn out that way though.  I have a place to get to and while I might be able to have a bit of wiggle room in the dates and the stops along way to and from the main stopover of the trip.

Before I left in an old Toyota 4-Runner loaded down with some furniture, some art, clothing, bedding and kitchenware to help my daughter start her new life with her honey, Tree Boy, I had opportunity to have lunch with a blogger who really knows how to travel.  Becky blogs at Kinexxions, a genealogical blog that focuses on the area and families from my old "neck of the woods."  I do love genealogy, local history, stories of community, and someone who can string words together in an entertaining way.  I stumbled across Becky's blog quite a while back and return to it because she is a darn fine writer from whom I can learn a thing or three!  It turns out I was the first of her readers with whom she had ever met.  I can't imagine that she hasn't met others as she is such an enchanting teller of stories of people, places, and procedures. 

She has been traveling and living out of her mobile blogging studio for quite a while now, her comfortably equipped van. That is so inspiring!  I met an actual woman who travels by herself, going places and doing research, taking photographs, and sharing the info unearthed along the way in her blog.  Of course as an anthropologist I have known  many women researchers and scientists who obviously travel, but to find a woman who lived the normal sedentary life, except for that stint in the military during the 1960s and 1970s, and only allowed her happy feet to dance across the country after retirement.  Hers is a generous practice, and an inspiring one.  Women who have a nomadic streak are not all that rare.  Women who act on the urge are however a bit harder to find.  She planned, met with a financial advisor, sticks to her budget, has a very well organized van, goals for her research, and does the research she is obviously meant to do. 

Becky was going through Tucson and we had arranged to meet.  I'm so glad it worked out.  We met at the patio section of The Cup Cafe of The Hotel Congress for Tortilla Soup and conversation.  Turns out we are shirt-tail relations! Hans Jakob Brubaker III who lived in the late 18th and early 19th Century was our last common ancestor from what we can tell.  The link was found through the South Whitley Brubakers.  We chatted about Whitley and Kosciusko Counties in Indiana, the place from which we both hail.  Becky is not a gregarious person, does not like driving in big cities, and met up with me with a bit of skepticism.  It was a bit out of character for me to just say, "Can we meet?" to someone I don't know, but I so am glad I did.  It really helped me frame the trip of the last two weeks and plot about how I might be able to do a trip much more like one Becky might do the next time I head out on the road.

It's All Relative - A Whirlwind Trip Through The Midwest

Just arrived home last evening, so perhaps it is an odd time to start a month of blogging about travel, but that is what I am doing.  I have a buzillion blog posts started, notes on things that need something written down about them, and well over a dozen voice notes of various lengths on my phone - that are  travel and driving observations.  I did not always have time on the road to put together a coherent post.  And sometimes I was too tired at the end of the day to put a coherent sentence together.

This month the writing theme over at BlogHer's Nablopomo is "Relative" so I added myself and this blog as a Travel Blog.  Traveling through time and space has always been my thing.  I wonder if my rather wry sense of humor comes through?  Oh well.

Anyway... relative is a good topic for me for this month as this whirlwind tour through the Midwestern U.S. that took about 2 weeks was a relative experience in oh so many ways.  The baseline reason for the trip was moving my daughter to Minneapolis.  She is most certainly a relative.  Family is a relative term.  I visited a few friends with whom I feel a bond that is just as close as family and closer, for me, than with many family members. I visited my brothers.  They are most certainly my relatives.  And all the experiences of the last weeks have shown me once again that most certainly everything is relative.

It is going to be an interesting month for me to see how I make sense of all the things I thought and did while making my way from Tucson, AZ to Minneapolis, MN, and back to Tucson with a quick loop through Chicago and Northern and Eastern Indiana.  That is the backdrop for this month's posts.

I hope you can join me this month as I document what was for me a very significant trip.

Chicago - Mishawaka - Kendallville - Fort Wayne - Columbia City

On the road again... as Willie would say. Thursday I drove away from Minneapolis and left my all grown up baby girl Zilla there.  I cried.  Then I drove to Chicago to drop in on the Wabash Kid and the Greek Goddess - if I could find the address where they lived and if they still lived there and were home.  I had lost their phone number years ago -- somehow.  I think it had been maybe 10 years since I had seen them.  I know their youngest child was very small then and he is 13 now.  The GG is maybe 3 years older than me and he is 9 years older.  Both look GREAT, but wowie zowie having a kid when you are a woman in your 40s or a man in your 50s sends shivers up and down my spine.  My Zilla is 22 and I am tired from raising her and getting her on her way in the world.  I can't imagine having another 10 years until my parenting responsibilities step down a notch. 

So... long story longer... I remembered the name of the street they lived on and the block and the exit I used to take to get to their house.  I put that info into my smart phone GPS Navigator thingy and drove there.  I couldn't remember the exact house number so I drove up and down the block a couple times until I thought I recognized the house.  Then I parked and walked up to the house and rang the bell.  After a couple minutes the Wabash Kid came to the door.  The first spark of wide eyed recognition and broad grin of happiness to see me spread across his face erased any worry I had about showing up unannounced.  I was so relieved to find them healthy and happy.  His music, recording, and painting that WB shared with me allowed me to know a friend with more depth and intimacy than I did many years ago.  That connection touched my heart.  We talked until after midnight and much of the next morning and on through lunch.  Conversation covered the gamut of family, friends, health, art, reading/speculative fiction, creativity, economics, politics and philosophy/religion.  

Wish I could have spent more time with the Greek Goddess but her schedule precluded very much interaction... and what did I expect given I dropped in out of the blue?  Usually I spend much more time with her.  This visit was still so good.  WB and I both seemed to synch.  No awkward silences.  There are not many people  who can pick up a friendship after 10 years of silence,  But sometimes I swear there are connections between people that extend beyond time and space.  I'm in awe of mystery of life from this interaction.  Did he need it?  Did I?  I don't know.  But my somewhat difficult to extinguish mystical nature is happy that this trip that is filled with the sadness of distance from my daughter and what will be the first trip to my parent's grave site since my mother's funeral has also allowed me the comfort of shared connection with old friends.

After Chicago, I visited - with some advance notice, but not much - I stopped for a quick evening visit, some good Vietnamese food, and Scrabble®/Words with Friends® and a tour of the home they just purchased last fall.  It has only been a year plus a few weeks since I had seen them, so there wasn't as much catching up to do and our talk centered on more pragmatic concerns.  Education, the field within which they both work, our grandchildren, mutual friends, and some talk of my writing, and word games filled our visit... along with some needed sound and restful sleep.   Then early afternoonish today, I headed out on Indiana 20 to State Road 9 to Highway 6 and Kendallville where I met up, at a local restaurant, with a girl friend  I had not seen since High School Graduation.  Again it was so good to see yet another friend and find out that though life may not have been perfect for any of us, that she was doing extremely well considering the adversity she has encountered in life and recent economic challenges that so many of us have encountered since 2008. 

Tomorrow is a family day.  Breakfast with my oldest brother's wife, and then an afternoon visit with the youngest of my brothers who still has 9 years on me.  From what I can deduce from a distance, neither of them are doing very well.  I will also visit the graves of two of my brothers and my parents.  I think it could be a difficult day tomorrow in some respects. 

My Daughter's First Home With Her Guy

I'm in Minneapolis.  Made it here yesterday after driving from Tucson.  I drove our SUV and Zilla drove her Jetta.  Everything is unpacked from the vehicle and she is setting up house.  She and Tree Boy found a great little house in a great neighborhood.  The only downside is from the sad situation that led to this great little home becoming a rental.  Upside-down house mortgage to house value ratio is involved here as it is with half the homes in the country. 

The dogs are slowly getting used to each other.  Zilla has her French Mastiff and Tree Boy has his Labrador. The problem comes from the Labrador thinking that Zilla is his "Mom" from knowing her in Tucson when Zilla and Tree Boy were dating.  He's jealous and the mastiff doesn't take any guff off of anyone.  The mastiff is wearing a muzzle in the house as if she bites the Lab back she will hurt him.  He bit her ear this a.m. but he has a soft bite and does not really hurt her.  She is really still honked off at him biting her.  On walks the situation changes, they both get along unmuzzled, just fine.  

Went with Zilla to the grocery today and helped her stock up on some basics for the kitchen and helped her step through the process of cooking a roast.  My baby's first meal cooked in her new home with her honey.  Makes me get teary eyed a little bit.  But when I tried to write earlier today, the Hubby called and Zilla walked in after a dog walk and wanted me to go grocery shopping with her.  I'm still looking forward to Eventually I will be able to write without interruption.  I know I will.  I know I will.  It will happen.  I will be done nesting.  Not done mothering, but done nesting. 

I'm helping Zilla set up her nest.  Fun, joyous, sad and frustrating, all bundled together.